23 April 2017

I Still Wonder...



A week ago, I wrote a post entitled Sometimes I Wonder. It was about simple thoughts that come to my mind, either because the subjects are really ridiculous, because they are something that has affected me deeply, because they are just things I’ve noticed, or maybe for no real reason at all.

I had enough material for one long post or for several shorter ones. I opted to make the first post relatively short, so here’s more:

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Sometimes I wonder why so many people – Americans, mainly – choose to board airplanes dressed as though they just got out of bed, are going to the swimming pool, or plan to just lie on the sofa, drink beer and watch TV all day. Sure, it’s good to be comfortable, especially on long flights, but when did having a little pride in your public appearance go so out of style?

And why would people assume that the rest of us have no problem sitting next to some grossly overweight guy in gym shorts, flip-flops and a sweaty T-shirt? It’s bad enough to have to see such people in stores and such (this is why I never go to Wal-Mart), but in airports and on the plane? Come on! Usually I am proud to be an American, but there are moments – like so often on airplanes – when I am embarrassed as hell.

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Sometimes I wonder why I get so badly afflicted with writer’s block, especially on work projects. No matter what I try, sometimes I just can’t get the wheels to turn and good stuff to come out.

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Sometimes I wonder if grizzly bears think people are tasty or just easy to catch.

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Sometimes I wonder what’s wrong with some pet owners. Why do they embarrass themselves (and their pets) by dressing the animals up in stupid-looking clothes and pretending that they are little people? Pets are not children. What kind of insanity is it to put a cat or dog in some absolutely ridiculous little costume, take a moronic photo, and then show it off to the world on Instagram or Facebook? They think they’re making their little darlings look “soooo cute,” but in reality they’re just making themselves look soooo stupid.

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And on the subject of pets, sometimes I wonder what possesses some people to bring their dogs into a restaurant, cafe or food store. And even worse, why do those establishments allow it? The last thing I want to see in a restaurant is a flea wagon at the table next to me or in the produce or meat section of the market. 

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Sometimes I wonder why anyone would voluntarily put a totally acidic substance – Coca Cola – into their stomachs. What that stuff does to you is just plain scary!

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Sometimes I wonder whether I will ever again know what it’s like to be completely free of pain.

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Sometimes I wonder what Neanderthal people were really like. I think it would be interesting to go back in time and see them.

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Sometimes I wonder what became of my truck after I sold it. And I wonder the same sometimes about my mountain house.

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Sometimes I wonder what it’s like to be normal.

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Sometimes (like this past week) I wonder why the city of Kharkiv always shuts off the heat too early and leaves the residents to freeze for a month or so until spring really gets going.

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Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if we had met under different circumstances and without so many years between us.

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Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be invisible, just for a while. But it would have to be in the summer unless it was possible for your clothes to be invisible too.

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Sometimes I wonder whether the world is teetering on the edge of the next major conflagration, when it will happen, and where it will start. (And I hope it won't start in Ukraine.)

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Sometimes I wonder why we often fall in love with someone whom it’s impossible to be with.

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Sometimes I wonder what happened to my passion. Where has my deep desire for writing gone? How has my joy for teaching English become almost completely extinguished? When did I lose my love of sports and working out (a long time ago, obviously)? It seems like even my passion for living has flittered away, and I don’t know how to get it back.

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Sometimes I wonder why so many people think that driving fast and dangerously in a piece of machinery that weighs several tons and can kill people is just some kind of fun and games. We see it in the U.S., of course, but it’s particularly bad here in Kharkiv. Young guys, especially in expensive cars, seem to think that the city streets are their personal racetracks, red lights are just suggestions, and other cars and pedestrians are annoying obstacles to either race around or maybe even hit. Sometimes I wonder how those people are even allowed to be on the road.

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Sometimes I wonder how crocodiles survived the asteroid that hit the Earth 65 million years ago and killed off all the dinosaurs.

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Sometimes I wonder why I bother trying to teach and encourage people to write correctly when all the world seems dead set to just write any way they feel like it. Why bother teaching proper punctuation when no one seems to care? Why try to get students to stop capitalizing common nouns when the corporate world capitalizes them all over the place (especially in marketing)? Why try to teach proper spelling when even other teachers can’t seem to get the difference between their and there? Why try to teach the difference between countable and uncountable nouns when corporate morons put out crap with “trainings,” “educations” and “advices”? And why try to do any of this when you constantly have to battle the confusion caused by differing national writing styles and even different style interpretations within the national styles? 

And don't even get me started on the effect the Internet has had on good writing.

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Sometimes I wonder what happened to the guy who used to actually teach positive thinking and power of intention seven years ago.

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Sometimes I wonder where I will go after my time in Ukraine is finished. (and whether that time is coming soon)

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Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I had stayed in the project management company and never come to Ukraine in the first place.

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For that matter, sometimes I wonder where I would be now if I had stayed in the navy for 20 years and gotten that lifetime, half-salary retirement package.

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And taking it even further, sometimes I wonder what would have happened if my parents had let me take piano lessons as a child like I wanted and not made me play the stupid trumpet.

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Sometimes I wonder whether we really have free choice in life. Are we all simply fated to make the choices we make and follow the paths we follow? Or are there really completely different life journeys for us, perhaps in an alternative universe?

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Sometimes I wonder if I’m as good a person as I imagine myself to be.

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Sometimes I wonder if I’m as bad a person as I imagine myself to be.

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And that’s enough for this edition. It’s time to get back to writing real stuff.

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